I’m thinking about braids today, so I thought I’d share this picture with you. This is 6 year old me. Before you ask, let me say that no, this picture was not taken the day I played Pippi Longstocking in a school play! It was, however, taken at school. My mom had forgotten about picture day, so there had been no hair washing or pin-curl setting the night before. I’m sure that mom, attempting to make me look presentable for picture day, chastised herself as she tried to coerce into braids the thin, stick-straight hair that I gave her to work with. She did her best, but in the end, that day my pencil-thin braids had both their opening day and final act while I smiled for the camera. All these years later, this picture still makes me smile!  

The other morning I was praying for a young gal I’d only recently met. She is a new believer who is also a new mommy. She opened up to ask a group of us to pray, because her fiancee isn’t happy that she is now living for Christ. As I prayed that morning, I found myself asking the Holy Spirit to be the third strand in their cord! I was thinking about the scripture that says a 3-strand cord is not easily broken:

Ecclesiastes 4:12 And if someone overpowers one person, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not easily broken.

That led me to pondering marriages.The Holy Spirit can bring strength to a marriage, even when only one partner is walking in close fellowship with the Lord. As the believing spouse holds tightly to the Lord, the other is strengthened as well!

I began to think about what I had prayed for the young couple. “God, be the 3rd strand in their cord.” I tried to visualize the process of braiding hair. (The process is the same whether whether for hair or a cord, right?) I was trying figure out exactly which sections of hair wrap around which. After a few cross-overs in my mind, I was boggled, so I checked out YouTube, and sure enough, I found exactly what I was looking for! Someone had used 3 differently colored dollar-store “leis” to demonstrate how to braid. It’s a fairly quick video, and I think as you read on, you’ll follow my thoughts more easily with the visual on this link! Otherwise, I may lose you!

As I watched the demonstration, I let the red strand represent the believing wife, the blue strand the unbelieving husband, and the yellow strand represent the Holy Spirit. The braiding began with the red strand (wife) wrapping herself closely to the yellow strand (Holy Spirit). Though the husband (blue strand) doesn’t care about walking with the Lord, he loves his wife and wraps himself to her. Next, yellow wraps over blue—the Holy Spirit wraps over the husband. So far, all of this matched the braiding I had done in my mind, but what came next surprised me. I expected that the second phase would be the opposite, with the blue wrapping over the yellow. But that didn’t happen. In fact, it never happened! As I continued to watch, I was surprised that the pattern stayed the same. Red over yellow, Blue over Red, Yellow over Blue. Repeat.

It was only the wife that wrapped around the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit never stopped wrapping the husband! The wife remains dependent upon the Lord, and He keeps working in her husband’s life. If she distances herself from the Lord, the cord would of course weaken. But as she remains a faithful follower and close listener, the Lord faithfully works in her husband’s heart and life.

As I thought about it, I noticed that the red cord never overstepped her job. She never reached over to try to do the Holy Spirit’s part. She did her part and trusted the Holy Spirit to do His. I’m not getting ready to write a theological exhortation on this, but I do believe there are nuggets of truth to be found in a cord of three strands…some, like I’ve described, for marriages with unbelieving spouses, and some for marriages where both are believers. (I’m thinking that when both husband and wife are believers, they take turns being the “red” or “blue” strands. 😉) In any case, without that third strand, the braid would unravel in seconds. Marriages take work no matter what, but when the Holy Spirit is welcomed as the third strand in the union, He is there to lean on, counsel, lead, bring correction, and securely braid the couple’s hearts together.

Father God, thank You for Bruce, and thank You for the faith he has in You! I’m so grateful that You hand-picked a husband for me whose love for You has never wavered. Help me to remember to stick to my part in the braid of our marriage, coming close to You daily, dependent upon Your presence, Your wisdom and Your grace. Although I know that You work on husbands’ hearts independent of us, I’m sure there are times when, as the 3rd strand in our braid, You are waiting on me to do my part and wrap my heart with yours, so that You can, in turn, do the same for him. I’m so glad that You are with us in our bond of covenant. Oh how I do love You!

P.S. Hmmm, maybe this kind of describes what Paul was referring to when he said the unbelieving partner is sanctified by the believing wife: 1 Corinthians 7:13-14a “And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is happy to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified because of the wife, and the unbelieving wife because of her husband…”

As Paul wrote this part of his letter to the Corinthian church, he was addressing some wrong thinking that some of them had in regards to marriage. It appears that some were wondering, “Now that I’m a Christian, should I leave my spouse, who is not a believer, in order to become more spiritual?” Paul’s answer was, “No!” But his instruction was meant to bring peace to the heart of the believing partner. “Don’t leave. The fact that you are still in your home, living a life that is dedicated to Christ, means that the Holy Spirit is there, and He is always working on your spouse. He’s not going to stop, because your spouse is a part of you!”